It occurred to me that my intense, deep and abiding love for pie has turned me into a cake racist. You heard me. A C-A-K-E RACIST! I am prejudiced towards cake, especially in the face of pie. Even the worst pie beats the best cake any day.
This epiphany came in the form of intense disappointment today at work. We received one of those delightful emails that comes occasionally on a rainy afternoon: "Treats in the breakroom!" Our choice today was pie or birthday cake.
Birthday cake?
Okay, before proceeding with the story, I have to pause for an anti-birthday cake rant. Birthday cake is the most horrific filth-infested monstrosity of an excuse for dessert ever to be unleashed on society. The genius of the criminal mastermind who invented it is plain enough: create a dessert that is almost totally tasteless and yet too sweet to actually be eaten. That part I get, but what I don't get is how an entire country got brainwashed into thinking that everyone should be forced to EAT this crap on their birthday. I thought birthdays were supposed to be fun!! Okay. Rant's over.
Back to the story. So I was late receiving the email today (because I was actually doing my job), but when I got the message I moved very swiftly in a break-roomy direction. I arrived. . .opened the door. (You see it coming?) No sounds of happy pie eaters. No clink of pie knives. No lights on even! The pie was gone, with only a smear of razzleberry goodness to show where it should have been and one, single stupid piece of CAKE laughing at me! LAUGHING!
Drowning in disappointment, but desperate for sweetness, I nibbled the cake and nearly threw up. Summoning my courage, I performed the only honorable action left to me. I licked the pie pan. I licked that pan. Yes I did. And oh, heaven!
Cake is rubbish. Pie is supreme. Pie is so superior to cake, in fact, that if just a single piece of pie showed up at the International Cake Olympics, that pie would win gold in every single event without a minute of training. Live with THAT, cake!
Living a life that has had many twists and turns. I am in love with God, my family, and my friends. I enjoy creation, art, writing, and spending quality time with those I love. I'm a deep thinker , a INFJ personality. Come sit with me a moment.
you should check out http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/
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